It came upon a midnight clear

My Dad was 10 in 1929, when the worlds of so many people he knew crashed all around him during the “Great Crash,” and that event is widely believed to have caused the Great Depression. If someone doesn’t understand the references, look it up -- I’m not teaching history here.

Well, 2009 might as well have been the Great Crash for me. Then, 2011 was really the end of my old life, which wasn’t so bad really. Between 2011 and 2013 I found my bottom, and was it a pip.

This column isn’t about what was lost, though. Because people lose things; all kinds of things get lost over time, from people to things, money and possessions, reputations and dreams. It is truly a wonderful life, but not everything is going to turn out sweet as pie at all times.

As advice, I would say people are the worst investment I ever put stock in, by and large. Still, if I hadn’t done that, went through the good times and the very hard ones, seen what hell looked like from the cheap seats and found some kind of redemption along the way -- well, it wouldn’t have been the life I am so very proud of and pleased about.

Here is a news break for the kids out there, or those who have suffered getting hit in the head with something big and heavy: Hard times comes and hard times go. Sometimes, plans work for people and sometimes they don’t. No one can control the world around them and believing they can will do nothing but disappoint someone and make them cry for a long time  But, the good news is very good: There is something good even in hard times, the worst of hard times.

I am never going to get back the things I lost in this life, but do any of us actually ‘own’ anything anyway? We rent our houses, which will eventually be owned by someone else. We only handle ‘our money’ because, eventually, it always ends up in someone else’s pocket: Last time I checked no one has a checking account in either heaven or hell. Loved ones, for as hurtful as it can be, will come and go more often than anyone wants. But through everything, if you can find and keep yourself -- you own everything you ever need in this world or the next.

Christmas has never been a big holiday for me. Hard times feel all the harder when there are holiday trees and all those people smiling and gushing cheer all over the place. If someone isn’t feeling good about their life, the first thing they will make a joke about is Christmas; because somewhere down deep they are miserable. Well, being ticked off at life is easy enough to do -- lots of things suck and that is no lie.

It is easy to hate the cards one has been dealt, because the dealer isn’t fair and is sometimes so repugnant you can smell him before you see him. Nevertheless, no one can take anything of value from someone if that someone possesses the one thing that is waterproof, fire-proof and even death-proof: Themselves. No one can stop the tides, hard luck or bad weather but they can like who they see in the mirror and have a little sympathy for the guy. Hell, I will go one further. Being the best friend to yourself will prevent one from living or dying hopeless -- because if you are your own best friend then you’ll never be alone and between you, your best friend and the Lord (whom I believe has walked with me every day in my hard times) you can even have a good game of cards.

Life is a gift. Even the bad parts of it is a gift. Sure, it is not always a gift one wants or even likes, but if someone lets the hard times do their best then, one day, they can look up and maybe they’ll have one more reason than they did the day before for getting out of bed. And, after that, they may come up with another one. And, so on. And, so on.

This is Christmas: A time when people should be kind to one another and overjoyed that the Lord gave them the life he did. At least that is what is on the marquee. I don’t believe people are all that nice (at least not in this day and age if they ever were). As a matter of fact, I don’t put a shot glass full of confidence in the better angels of humanity, as a rule of thumb. But, I have come to believe in the Lord and myself -- the greatest gift a man entering his last act can have. So, the sun is a little brighter, the birds chirp a bit louder and, having acknowledged that this life never will be that “Wonderful Life” Jimmy Stewart knew or Andy Griffith’s “Mayberry RFD,” I look at things around me for what they are and I can like them well enough.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not happy I was ruined or that those who helped me out in getting ruined did it. Still, last time I checked I’m not in charge of anyone but me. There is someone who is in charge of sorting out what people did and didn’t do, and I’m not talking about Judge Judy. I don’t have to carry the weight of the world, or anyone else’s weight for that matter. Heck, I have my own problems just fending off another piece of pie for dinner.

I lived through the hard times, though, despite horrible, horrible experiences. Those experiences don’t own me anymore, as much as they have been lived and are simply a part of the record where I am involved.

There are special people in my life today, and they don’t expect a damn thing from me other than that I try and do the best I can day to day. God put them in my life and I am really happy about that. And, the people he took away, I guess he knew what he was doing with that too.

If you are reading this and you’re life has been going fine and everything is just wonderful, well this is wasted on you. God bless and may the road rise to meet you still. But, if you are down-and-out, if you are looking at the wolf at the door and he is either getting in or he is walking around the living room -- and it seems like all hope is lost -- I’m here to tell you it isn’t.

Sure, things are going to suck for a while. And, don’t lie to yourself or listen to any of that cheap confection TV ministers are shoveling at you: Not everything is roses and its not supposed to be. Sometimes, you take your licks and go through a little hell. Maybe some violence will be done to your spirit, body and mind. Never think you’re alone, though. There really is a God. If someone doesn’t believe that I really don’t give a damn. The Lord doesn’t need me to ring doorbells for him. I’ll just say he is there and leave it at that.

This world is really very beautiful, even with the muck and mire in it here and there. It’s definitely worth a good long look. When you’re out of money and luck, don’t throw your cards in -- it gets better. If you hang around long enough good stuff will happen. Just look at high school, all you have to do is show up enough and you can be the dumbest bump on the log out there and they’re still going to hand you a piece of paper one day saying you graduated. Maybe life is just a little like that, I don’t know.

So even if you’re not having the happiest of Christmases this year, not to worry. Hang around long enough, do your best not to be stupid (even if you’ve previously made a career out of it) and good things will happen. No one is perfect and everyone deserves a second, third or even fourth chance. There was only one perfect man in this world, and we killed him for it. So, if you are a screw up trying to dig yourself out of a big ass hole, not to worry, there are a whole lot of other people digging right next to you.

Oh, and if you ever have another shot at love (I don’t mean the insane kind) -- do it. I am pretty sure it’s why we were put on this earth in the first place.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!